A Chronic Voice Linkup Party: June 2019

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This is a pin for you to share on Pinterest. It reads "Wondering, Turning and Desiring When You Have a Chronic Illness".

I really enjoyed writing a post for A Chronic Voice’s May Linkup so I decided I’d participate in A Chronic Voice’s Linkup Party June 2019! This month I’ll be writing about wondering, turning and desiring when you have a chronic voice. I feel these are very fitting, as recently I’ve been wondering what my life would be like if I wasn’t chronically ill and desiring a normal life.

All 5 of A Chronic Voice’s Linkup Party June 2019 prompts:

  • Repeating
  • Wondering
  • Turning
  • Getting
  • Desiring

You can find A Chronic Voice’s post about this linkup here.


I often wonder what my life would be like if I didn’t have a chronic illness (or three) and I’m sure other spoonies feel the same way sometimes. I wonder what it would be like if I wasn’t constantly worrying that I’ll have a seizure, or what I would be eating if I could eat normal-person food. My illness makes me wonder if I’d be taking my A Levels around this time like my friends are, and if I’d be going to uni in September.


I finally feel my life is turning a corner. I’ve spent 10 days in hospital over the past few weeks and I finally have two more diagnoses to go with my Hypermobility Spectrum Disorder (HSD). I’ll write a post about them soon, but the two diagnoses I was given during my second admission were Non-Epileptic Attack Disorder (NEAD) and Functional Neurological Disorder (FND). Although I don’t want to be chronically ill, I am and these diagnoses finally put names to some of my symptoms.


I desire a normal life. I want to be healthy, to take my A Levels and go to uni. My illness strips me of this. I often feel my life is unfair. What have I done to deserve this? I desire diagnoses and cures and proper management. This is what my life has turned into – the constant desire for medical advances so that I can live a relatively normal life. I know that I’ll never be better, but I would do anything to feel normal again.

If you loved this post (and I’m SURE you did, considering you’re reading this), you NEED to check out my eBook 10 Things You Need to Know About Living with Chronic Illness!

This is a pin for you to share on Pinterest. It reads "Wondering, Turning and Desiring".

4 Replies to “A Chronic Voice Linkup Party: June 2019”

  1. It must be such a relief to finally have gotten some answers to what is going on with your body. Having been diagnosed with FND myself, I also know that it can also result in even more answers that we don’t know the answers to. Wishing you all the best for the future; you seem like such a determined person so I am sure that you will take your exams and go to university. I didn’t have the answers to what was wrong with me when I was 18 and still, along with my many symptoms I still went to university and managed to graduate. You can get there ❤️

    1. It’s both an annoyance and a relief! And thank you, you can get wherever you want to go, too ❤️

  2. Hope the diagnosis continues to be helpful 🙂

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